Is This a Simulation?

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2 mins read

The Simulation Hypothesis is the latest in bong resin philosophy:

Top bank analysts claim there’s a 50% chance our world is a computer simulation and we’re all plugged into a Matrix-style virtual reality.
And they also reckon if it’s true – then there’s no way we’ll ever find out about it.
The Bank of America’s Merrill Lynch made the astonishing claim in a research note citing comments by top scientists, astrophysicists and philosophers.

You remember that one guy in high school who was always staring at his hand? You asked him one time why he did that and he looked up with sort of a glazed look on his face.

I put the odds at 50%

“Dude,” he began. “You know how, like, your hand is made of atoms? What if those atoms were really tiny universes? Our whole universe could be just one atom in some giant’s hand.  But that means that your hand is made of up of millions of little universes.”
He looked back down and flexed his hand. You backed slowly away.
Well, that guy is now a top bank analyst, apparently.
The “Matrix” theory of our universe has gotten a lot of traction, or at least popular press, recently.  Part of that is because a few press masters like Elon Musk are a big proponents of the theory. Part of it is because The Matrix was a pretty cool movie and people want to sound cool by associating themselves with it.  No small part is because academics get to fly to really exotic locations on the taxpayers’ dime to talk about it.* And the more press it gets, the better they eat.
God doesn’t play dice with this world.

But it’s still not science, much less math.  If you reduce the options of any theory being true to a binary, and have absolutely no choice but to choose one, then a 50% chance is as good a number as any. That’s just the way coin-flipping works.  And despite the credentials and confident tone of whatever pseudo-philosopher is laying the odds, coin-flipping is what the theory is. No one can put odds on something for which he could not possibly have any data.  And we simply do not have any such data. In fact, embedded in the theory is the claim that we cannot find such data.  What we have instead are dozens of variations on the phrase “it is conceivable” and a vague, hopeful, man-centered claim on eternal life.  The Simulation Hypothesis, like the Singularity, is a replacement religion for technology-worshippers.
Still, the Simulation Hypothesis is not as offensive to Christians as many of the proponents seem to think.  In a very real sense, Christians already know we are in a ‘simulation’ – a universe that was created especially for us, yet is more temporary than us, and is something of a testing ground to see how we react to various stimuli during our time in it. We are assured that this present reality is not our true home. Instead, we will live on after it’s gone, in a real country and with our real King.
Unlike those who hope to find eternal life as superfluous bytes in some cosmic databank, we do not believe that those whom we created are running the code. Instead, we are assured that our reality was designed and is being run by One who created us for something much more than we can imagine. It is something we will see when, with a crown upon His head and His clothing dipped in blood, Jesus Christ returns and pulls the plug on this current program.
* Think Acts 17:21 with tweed jackets instead of togas.

El Borak is an historian by training, an IT Director by vocation, and a writer when the mood strikes him. He lives in rural Kansas with his wife of thirty years, where he works to fix the little things.

3 Comments

  1. If it walks like a duck, and it quacks like a duck, does it really matter if it’s a small goose?
    If it is a simulation, there is no way of escaping it… and thus, it simply makes sense to treat it as if it were real. It’s like Pascal’s argument in favor of God.
    It cannot be proved philosophically, and there is absolutely zero evidence, let alone proof. At least with God, there is tons of evidence, if no outright indisputable proof.
    Basically, the entire question is nothing more than a way for little men with mediocre intellect to try and be relevant, hoping for a mark in a history book that is never going to be written, or a way for Atheists to try and prove their contraintellectual theology of the nonexistence of God.
    It is often truly amazing, the lengths to which immoral people will go to try and prove that their immorality is moral or justifiable.If you ever need proof that the Devil is real, watch these evil people try to rationalize their evil into good, their sins into proof of moral rectitude, and their selfishness into the perception of selflessness. It’s like a con artist claiming he is helping the economy by ripping off senior citizens, or an abortionist preaching about how they are saving the future of the girls they have stripped of the fruit of their wombs.

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