America just elected a president who promises to look after the interests of the Men of The West. Awesome. But don’t get complacent. This is not victory. This is just one battle won in a long war, and our enemies are looking for blood. Get your ass to the gym so you can show them their own fucking blood! As promised this article will cover what to do to get Beast without a gym, but first I want to cover something important that I forgot to mention last week; supplements.
Protein: If you buy nothing else get protein. It can be very difficult getting enough daily protein and Whey powder mix is a God-send. You don’t have to go name brand either. Walmart sells Body Fortress for about $17 and it’s got everything you need. Whey protein is best consumed before and after your work out, but especially after as it is fast digesting and will go right to repairing your broken down muscles.

Pre-work out: Use with caution. Some of these can make you feel light headed, flushed, or restless. Almost all of them will keep you awake if you take them too late in the day. Also, every brand I’ve tried eventually stops feeling effective. So you will probably end up swapping brands once in awhile. But experiment and find one that works for you. Also, despite the claims, none of these will get you ripped or shredded or huge. You might crank out a few more reps, but generally these are best used for getting you off the couch and out the door.

Test Boosters. Mostly garbage. The only one that I can vouch for as being actually effective is ZMA (Zinc, Magnesium Asparate). Zinc and Magnesium are known natural test Boosters (oysters are an aphrodisiac because of this). I’ve also heard good things about D-Aspartic acid. All other supplement test Boosters are junk and only work temporarily, if at all. Also, the thing to keep in mind with these is that they will never push your natural test past its natural limits.

Creatine: If you are eating plenty of meat, eggs, and dairy for your high protein food you are getting plenty of creatine already. I don’t recommend using it as a supplement. Any benefits gained are lost once you stop taking it.

Steroids: Buyer beware. These are illegal, and dangerous if not used correctly. However, they work. I know guys who got huge and lean in just a few months taking them. Watch the Netflix documentary Bigger Stronger Faster to dispel a lot of the stigma about them. But if you do choose to use them do your research first. And expect to spend hundreds of dollars a month on them. Often the benefits gained quickly go away once they are stopped.

SARMS: Selective Androgen Receptor Molecules. These are the next best thing. Some nerds fucked around with shit enough to make a substance that triggers your muscle Androgen receptors, without triggering the receptors in other parts of your body, like the heart, liver, brain, etc etc. Plus they aren’t hormone, so no estrogen conversion of testicular shut down. In short they have steroid like benefits (some say 75℅ as effective) without the negative side effects, and they are legal.

Next topic.  No Gym?
I’ve seen gyms in even the smallest towns so you are probably just not looking hard enough. But my first recommendation…and I highly highly highly suggest that you do this… is to buy or build your own power rack. A power rack is basically a cage that allows you to set safety bars for your barbell. It is essential for solo lifting as the power rack will give you everything that you need to do all of the four core lifts, except the weight. Basic weights can be purchased at a sporting good store or Walmart.  Building a power rack can cost less than $100.

Or you can just buy one for as little as $250.

I don’t recommend fucking around with one that doesn’t offer the complete cage. God forbid you fail to get up on a squat and fall backwards. Put the power rack in your garage, barn, a storage shed, anywhere that has a level surface, and try to put in on good sturdy ply wood that will cushion the abuse from the weights. The rack with a good Olympic barbell and 300-400 lbs of weights are all you will need to begin your beast journey. Make sure that you get the smaller weights so that you can add 5 lbs at a time to grow. Buy adjustable dumbbells to help supplement your core lifts too.

So, what do you do if you live on a farm and are don’t have the money to buy the rack and weight? Well, you’re probably pretty beast as it is from all that farm labor, but there are a few things that you can do to really kick it up.
Tire flipping: Strongmen love this. It is like a dead lift for your entire body. Find an old tractor tire, or a truck tire if you’re not strong enough, squat down and grab it, and flip that fucker until you are too tired to do it anymore.

Rope climb: Hang a good solid rope from a branch and climb it. Start with using your feet to grip the rope and progress to total arm pulls. Here are 10 progressively more difficult exercises.

Push-ups: No bench press? Just flip it over and push the whole earth down! There are a wide variety of regular push-ups that you can do to target your arms and chest in different ways, such as close handed, wide handed, feet raised up, and tricep pushes. But once you get past a certain point doing 100 push ups won’t do much for you. Grab a back pack and throw some heavy crap in there. Milk jugs, small people, etc. Then do some weighted push ups.

Sled pushing and truck pull: Strap some rope around your shoulders and tie the other end to a truck or tractor. For safety have somebody ride inside so they can brake and you don’t die. Pull it around until you feel yourself getting ready to pass out, which shouldn’t be long. Grab a snow sled, throw some heavy crap on it and push it until you get close to passing out.

These four exercises will make up your core routine. If you do them you will probably say “fuck it” and just find the nearest gym. The bonus is charging cross fitters and hipsters $100 a month to come to your farm and do them. Now you have the money for your power rack.