On the Naming of Children

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7 mins read

One of the key tenets of the Men of the West strategy for reclaiming Western Culture is the production of more Western children. In other words, Men of the West should get up from their keyboards, find a good woman, get married, and produce offspring. Lots of them. Generally, we view three children as being the absolute minimum. Any less, and we are not producing offspring at a rate sufficient to ensure the survival of the West.
ancestry-2As we accomplish this vital task, we must also consider how one should go about naming these children, because names matter. In modern times, this important component has often been overlooked, leading to the proliferation of idiotic names that one comes across on a regular basis. There is no need for us to produce an exhaustive list of these abominable appellations, since we do not want to encourage their continuation. Plus, you know exactly what we mean, since you encounter them, too.
If you do not think names are important, then tell me if you are considering Judas or Jezebel for your own children. Of course not. We know that those names are so tarnished that they would lead to disastrous consequences for the children so named.
Names mean something. In some cases, the names have literal definitions. For example, the name “Joshua” is an anglicized version of a Hebrew name, meaning “YHWH saves.” Or consider “Sarah,” another anglicized Hebrew name, meaning “Princess.”  “Robert” has a Germanic origin and means “Bright Fame.”  Sometimes names speak of locations, familial history, or other important aspects of culture. Suffice it to say, the naming of children, and the choice made in that regard, is important.
So how does one properly choose names for children? There are three major acceptable options. These options can be mixed and matched, when appropriate. There are also some potential exceptions to these naming strategies, which will be addressed.
First, you can go Biblical/Religious. This is an easy option, especially if your family has not previously been cognizant of the importance of proper naming. Read the scriptures and find a good name that exhibits the characteristics you want your child to embody. If you come from a church that recognizes important religious leaders from post-biblical times, then you can consider them, as well. Popular choices from this category would be the names of the Apostles, Old Testament heroes, martyrs, and saints. Using this option allows your child to have an established tie to his (or her) spiritual forebears.
Secondly, you can use important historical names. Often, these names overlap with the first option, but there are some exceptions. You might choose names from military heroes, national heroes, or other important historical characters. This is a great way to connect your child with his (or her) cultural ancestors.
Thirdly, traditional family names are a viable option. Here, you can choose to name a child after the father, grandfather, or some other recurring name in the familial lineage. One common option, in the South, is to use the mother’s maiden name as the child’s middle name. Sometimes, that might produce some odd names, but it still establishes a connection between the child and his (or her) heritage. Whether using a maiden name or not, it is common, and acceptable, to name the child after an admirable ancestor. Of course, the names in this list will often have much overlap with those in the first two strategies.
Those are the three major strategies for naming a child. Now, that does not mean that a child not named from these options is poorly named. For example, it is also acceptable, though less common, to name a child after a location of significance. Perhaps one would like to name a child after a prized object (within reason – do not name a child something like “Dodge Ram”). These techniques are acceptable, if used properly, but should probably be reserved for those who have established the ability to effectively name children. In other words, do not attempt this on the first child. Save it for the fifth or sixth, once you have your feet under you, as it were.
As an example, my wife and I decided to give each of our children a Biblical name. We also chose a middle name from our familial heritage, naming the boys after their great-grandfathers. The daughter shares a middle name with two older cousins. As it turns out, every single one of our children’s names is also the name of an honorable person from history. So we were able to combine all three strategies, giving our children a great tie to their religious, cultural, and familial ancestors.
What you do not want to do is get ‘cute’ when naming the child. Consider the actor/director Ron Howard, who gave his children their middle names based uponmoon-unit-zappa-04 the location of their conception. That is ridiculous, regardless of what name is chosen. Ever after, their very names will be indicative of their parent’s copulation habits. That is silly. Much better would be tying the name to something lasting and honorable.
Celebrities are often the worst offenders at this ‘cute’ game. Consider Frank Zappa’s name choices: Moon Unit, Dweezil, Diva Thin Muffin…what the heck do you do with those? That is just insane. Courtney Cox and David Arquette named their daughter Coco. Jason Lee has a son named Pilot Inspektor. These poor kids have a long uphill climb to be normal, much less useful.
So as you proceed to produce Western offspring, keep these strategies in mind. Give careful consideration to the names you apply to each child.

Lead Scheduler at MOTW. Husband, Father, but most importantly, a man of God. Possesses more degrees that most people find useful.

25 Comments

  1. Adam, after the second one, and Daniel, because he stayed true in a strange land.
    No matter what you choose, stand at the back door and scream it at the top of your lungs, if you don’t sound like an idiot, it’s a good name

    • That is good practical advice. I cannot imagine that yelling “Sheniqua Monisha” from the door sounds anything besides idiotic, so that just might work.

  2. No one bothers asking for my opinion on baby names. Too many times, people have given me a name they are thinking about and I just look at them and say, “There are a lot of good names in the Bible.” Usually, they get mad, but that’s O.K. Giving your child a “clever” name is a selfish act.

    • People I know quit asking me about names, if they want to just get rubberstamped, as they know I will give it to them hard and fast, if they are trying to be clever.

    • Right. That is why I pointed out that it could be “biblical or religious,” as many great Christians came post-Bible times, and would be worthy names. Good examples.

  3. Our struggle was that, my wife being 8 out of 9 rather prolific brothers and sisters was coming up with something semi original

  4. Around here that makes you sound Amish. I do however, know a Jonathan Edwards Shamgar (last name) . So there’s that.

  5. Coco historically isn’t too bad of a name if you realize that Coco Chanel(real name Gabrielle) was/is one of the finest French fashion houses for women ever. She has been dead since 1971 but her House of Fashion lives on.
    She designed what became an instantly identifiable suit design and invented the “little black dress” concept that ladies cannot do without. Ask your wives about that subject.
    This was one of the best articles I have seen so far on this blog. You touched on something that I have believed in for a long time. I just cringe when people name their kids with either something cutesy stupid, or the spelling of the basic name is so outlandish they have to spend their entire lives explaining it to people how to pronounce it, or spell it properly. That is the first act of cruelty to their precious child IMO.
    Thank you very much.

    • Thanks. On Coco, maybe it works in French, but in English, it sounds like a hot chocolate beverage. That just won’t work.

      • Also, do you really want to name your daughter after a women who became famous for creating clothing for women to go out and get laid in? Seems like it might be sending the wrong message…

  6. You correctly pointed out that all names (unless you are black) have a meaning and many people still name their children after qualities that they desire their children to engender. Beauty, honesty, faithful, etc. are all common names. Personally, I would be most inclined to use the more common German, Frankish, Gaelic or Welsh terms rather than English as people will be more familiar with them and the ‘modern’ child less prone to abuse.
    Plus, it sounds better.
    I encourage new parents (who know something about their ancestry) to reconnect with their roots. People of german descent might want to look up some good german names and what they mean, then name their child accordingly.
    I do agree that naming your child is very important. It is an old Christian tradition that men who share the same name also share a special connection; one should think about who they are connecting their child to. Of course, sometimes those connections cannot be helped, but we do what we can.

  7. Less significant, but a pet peeve. Faddish spellings of names. Unless there’s a particular reason (related to family, and so on) just pick the standard spelling.

  8. Son #1 – Named after a Confederate General, whose first name is also Biblical and common in my family. Makes SJWs literally shake.
    Daughter – English/Gaelic variation of a Biblical name, middle name common family name on my mother’s side.
    Son #2 – English first name, middle name same as myself (old German), my grandfather, and great-grandfather. His first and middle name together mean “Warrior with a spear.”
    Son #3 – Finnish variation of Biblical name (my wife’s grandmother was Finnish) , middle name Gaelic.
    People who name their kids with androgynous names or unconventional spellings are people that are attention whores who are punishing their children with a lifetime of unnecessary nonsense.

  9. Son #1: Old Testament first and middle names
    Son #2: Old Testament first and middle names
    Daughter: Old Testament first name, ancient saint’s name with family connection for middle name
    Son #3: We modernized; first and middle names are both apostles

  10. I named my son after a literary character. I picked it because I liked it. It’s an adventurous name and I hope it serves him well. My last name is fairly unique and as far as I know, my son’s name is unique in history without being something he’s going to get any trouble for.

  11. We gave both children 1st names after beloved or important family members – giving them a solid foundation of belonging and history to start on. Middle names were historical figures (M) and literary (F) while still being related/belonging to past family member names.

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